…Well, it’s original in that I organized these loops that come with GarageBand into a tune. But I can’t take credit for creating the samples themselves.
(Free download. Enjoy!)
On this Cinco de Mayo, Lady GaGa releases another music video fraught with Christian/Catholic themes and imagery. “Judas” is a good song. The video is ho-hum: it’s nothing new.
Here are the things in the video we’ve seen from GaGa before:
What: GaGa dances in bikini with posse
Videos where we’ve seen it before: Telephone, Born This Way, Alejandro
What: GaGa looks longingly into camera for close-up
Videos where we’ve seen it before: Alejandro, Born This Way (to name just two)
What: Red, white, and blue with bandana outfit
Videos where we’ve seen it before: Telephone
What: GaGa in Catholic clergy clothes
Videos where we’ve seen it before: Alejandro
What: GaGa in bathtub
Videos where we’ve seen it before: Bad Romance
How many times does GaGa have to get her Madonna on before she branches out beyond the Catholic themes?
The interviews are coming. I promise. As is my top 10 albums of 2010 list, for those who care. Meanwhile, check out this awesomeness:
Black Friday sounds like a cool name for a band, doesn’t it? Oh, wait–it is the name of a band. At least two bands, actually, according to a Google search. Well, never mind. The point is that if you put the word “Black” in front of any word, you can usually make a decent-sounding band name. Bonus points if you put the word “The” at the beginning because it just sounds more authoritative that way.
I will now demonstrate by creating the following non-existent bands:
The Black Monkeys
Black Basket Fraternity (If you make it sound like a pre-existing organization, that works well.)
Black Caucasian (Oxymorons are always effective.)
And so, to celebrate the consumer holiday utopia that is Black Friday, here are ten great songs from ten “Black” bands — with one solo performance exception. Enjoy!
1. Black Label Society – “Crazy Horse”
2. The Black Crowes – “Good Morning Captain”
3. The Black Angels – “You On the Run”
4. The Black Keys – “Midnight in Her Eyes”
5. Black Flag – “Six Pack”
6. The Black Lips – “Short Fuse”
7. Black Joe Lewis & the Honeybears – “Sugarfoot”
8. Black Sabbath – “Supernaut”
9. Joan Jett and The Blackhearts – “Do You Wanna Touch Me”
10. Jack Black – “The Legend of the Rent”
A few choice quotes from my upcoming interview with Roger Greenawalt…which I have been transcribing for TWO WEEKS. I broke my own twenty-minute limit rule and let the man talk for an hour. It was worth it.
“Warren Buffet loves the ukulele. Won’t ever be as good as me at it. Never. There was never any chance.”
“I don’t give a fuck about music anymore. I really just want it to be like an atmosphere that’s SO believable, and you’re in it, and there happens to be music playing in it.”
“We’re just all suckin’ the vocal’s dick. ‘Cause it’s really all about the human voice. That’s what our brains wanna hear.”
…Stay tuned for the full interview, coming soon…
Two years ago, I wrote a two-part blog post for the Houston Press about “Ten Gruesomely Good Halloween Songs” (read Part 1 and Part 2 at Rocks Off). That’s still one of the most fun things I’ve ever written — fun for me, anyway. So in the spirit of the season, I’m revisiting the idea of a Halloween mix. Here are ten treats to accompany your tricks in 2010.
1. Alice Cooper – Welcome to My Nightmare
What would Halloween be without a little Alice? Ever the good-natured ghoul, Mr. Cooper welcomes us to his nightmare with some help from the Muppets.
2. Outkast – Dracula’s Wedding
This song is about the scariness of actually getting what you want. Healthy adult relationships are pretty terrifying, aren’t they?
3. Lou Reed – Halloween Parade
To appreciate this one, you have to know two things: 1) that the annual NYC Halloween Parade is a huge event that takes place in Greenwich Village, historically the heart of the city’s LGBT community, and 2) that this song was written in 1989, at the height of the AIDS crisis.
4. Rob Zombie – Superbeast
You can hear the NIN influence from co-songwriter Charlie Clouser in this song, which is kind of a great pop song in its own right. The pre-chorus refrain of “The ragged they come, and the ragged they kill” is super catchy, syncopated against the beat. And for some reason, I really want to choreograph a high school drill team field routine to this song, with high kicks and everything. Don’t ask me why. I guess it would be for the shock value. I’d love to see it at the homecoming game. Probably because I hated high school.
5. Jayce Everett – Bad Things
Even though True Blood has progressed through its three seasons from a sexy Southern Gothic fantasy to a ridiculous soap opera bloodbath, the song from the opening credits remains relatively undead.
6. The Dresden Dolls – Mandy Goes to Med School
Forget about the pregnant women hammering each others’ stomachs with mallets (and please ignore the random George Michael interlude); this video is all about the jam. Amanda and Brian play off of each other so well, it’s as if they’ve got musical telepathy.
7. Michael Jackson – Blood on the Dance Floor
Bet you thought this was gonna be “Thriller”, right? Nope.
8. The Sword – Tres Brujas
From The Sword’s new album, Warp Riders. The record is more space-aged than spooky, but this song (which means “Three Witches”) adds some necessary mischief to this potion of a playlist we’re concocting.
9. Spinnerette – The Walking Dead
Brody: call me.
10. Ozzy Osbourne – Mr. Crowley
Who better than the Prince of Darkness to finish up this mix? For a really good scare and more info on the true story behind this song, watch this 30-minute online BBC documentary about Aleister Crowley. And for the love of God, DON’T GO IN THAT HOUSE!
In the interest of full disclosure, I’m reporting the results of a music preference quiz I took on signalpatterns.com. It’s pretty nifty. You listen to music clips and rate them, and then the site gives you a profile of what your tastes tend to be. Even if you consider yourself relatively self-aware, it’s interesting to see how what you think you like compares with your score on the quiz. A fun time-waster, if nothing else.
According to the quiz, my music preferences are “tempo, loud, and aggressive,” with the characteristics “instrumental” and “complex” ranking not far behind the first three.
I guess I’m using this post as a disclaimer. Basically, if I don’t like your music, most likely that’s because it’s too slow, quiet, passive, non-instrumental (whatever that means), and simple for my tastes. I suppose if you were quietly singing a slow song a cappella, I’d get bored. That doesn’t mean your music sucks. It means I’m probably innately biased against it. Consider yourself warned.
Amazing how unemployment brings out one’s penchant for wasting time creatively. Now you, too, can hear the new little ditty I’ve composed. Yippee!